more squirrelly thoughts

*

*

the past is finite

the future is infinite

and

the present – it just is……

…….

all in a manner of speaking

*

*

inspired by a ‘past’ movie night with my boys – X-Men: Days of Future Past

*

*

(ps:  I enjoyed the movie very much, although I did need a chaser of Tylenol afterward.

Thank heavens I have Marvel geeks for sons!!)

~ standing ~

•

in front of us

stands time.

never knowing how much,

how little.

staring and wondering,

wanting to touch it.

to grab and

hold tight ~ never wanting to let go.

•

though standing

in front of us ~

time is not still ~ always

crawling, walking, running, leaping ~

beyond what we can see and not

see.

•

time will always lead.

I will always follow ~ until

time no longer stands

in front

of

me.

•

•

to soar…far

~

from miles away,

your words

speak softly in my ear.

each word tapping into my senses

creating

a wealth of emotion ~ ~ ~

unleashing the spirit

to soar

above the heavens

into

a realm of dreams

and

~ desire ~

where

infinity

defies

all boundaries

of

distance

and

time

~

~

 

an afternoon sky

marbles

•

i

woke up

this morning

all present and

all accounted for.

as the minutes ticktocked by,

one by one they slowly fell –

rolling away…far from my grip.

by nightfall, my basket was empty.

it seems i have lost all of my marbles!

•

•

•

a singular moment

˜˜˜

˜

briefest of moments…

anticipation flutters

alone  – not lonely

purest of joy becomes strength

before the curtain rises…

˜

˜˜˜

Paquita – 1987

dedicated to the artist in us all

“I have to make a movie…”

♦

little man with Lego’s

dreaming his magical stories

bigger man with camera

filming his magical dreams

♦

♦

♦

A future Spielberg?

♦

back in 2008 – leaning against Barney, scouring Entertainment Weekly magazines, with his 6′ Oscar behind him

♦

2014 – using the grown up ‘stuff’

♦

when Jordan was little, he would say ” I gotta make a movie” and then run away… to his toys and Legos…

NOW

when he goes away to school, he tells his crying mom

“I have to make a movie”

♥

nine years ago…

March 6th, 2005

the day she came home

♥

♥

face on a website

a precious discovery

love at first snuggle

mommy, daddy and brothers

a family’s new beginning

♥

♥

supervising mommy
while she cooks for the boys – 3/5/14

♥

my everything

♥

♥

my boys are both here

it is quiet no longer

i am now complete

♥

♥

tiny pictures taken many years ago….

Yes, a complete set and with Sydnee Pee a balance has been achieved.  Much laughing, cooking, eating and ‘cleaning’ to be had with lots of tum tum, walkies and cuddles.  Life is good.

…train ride…

………

a high-speed train to nowhere

is how i see my life

on tracks with no direction –

littered with much chaos and strife.

*

there are times i am fully aware

i know perfectly what to do

then

there are others

when

i am drowning –

completely lost

without even a clue.

*

sometimes i wish i could vanish –

disappear without leaving a trace

but

then

I could not imagine leaving –

not

being a part of the human race.

*

then

there are those moments i get to thinking …

will all be worth it in the end?

will i be pleased with the roads i have traveled…

including the final journey…

…………………………………….

the one in the distance –

around the bend?

*

i know the answer already

but it is hard not to reflect –

for me it is another way of trying to think…

of being thorough and circumspect.

*

i do realize the answers will present themselves

when the train reaches the end of the line

until then i will sit in my seat

doing the best to live –

to navigate

my

life.

………

almost gone

♥

in less than a month,

he is going away,

my baby is going away.

*

he will be off on his own,

away from his home,

the only home he’s ever known.

*

i am trying hard not to cry,

not to shed one tear

keep a smile on my face,

leave no trace of my fears…

*

no trace of my fears –

– in letting him go

– not hugging him tight

or looking in his eyes.

not having him near –

– sitting by my side

– hearing his laugh

or kissing him good night.

*

i know i must let go –

let him go his own way,

go out into this world –

what else can I say …

but

i love miss him

and

will miss him

so,

so

very

much.

♥