a world of many

~

this world is full of beating hearts

and

in the middle of them all

i stand ~

a no one amongst many

and

a someone to a few

and

always

wishing for another ~

who is

also

a no one searching for

another one

to be their someone ~

their only one

now

and

forever

~

~

~

need directions ~ ~

¤

i am standing on the edge of my creation ~

a maelstrom of chaos and uncertainty.

~

where does one go…

~

step over the edge

and

free fall into the arms of chance…

~

or

~

run away………….toward nothingness?

¤

 

sometimes ~

10 for Tuesday = ten word story #3

*

*

“If I continue working with you,

it will destroy me.”

*

*

*

a note:   After having spent 10 years working for a company, established by my very, very best and closest friend, I recently left my place of employment.  I gave all that I could to a business which gave me everything and after Bill’s death, it took more than I ever thought I had – to give – to run a business without the person whose life ‘was’ the business.   Since the sale of the company,  I continued to remain faithful to Bill’s vision but his ways and that of the new owner, though I knew there would be differences, could never be more opposite from one another.    In the past half a year, I have been watching a slow death unfold in front of my eyes and I have decided I cannot go through losing Bill a second time.

*

one more note:  Please excuse my lack of attention when it comes to my time – my life – here.  Yes, I am looking for a job and this is having to take priority, though I will say… I do need my WP family – I adore all of you.

 

the night air

~

as nighttime touches my skin,

my mind fills with desire

~ each heartbeat fuels a need ~

to be touched,

to be held,

to be wanted

yet

the rhythm of my cries fall on deaf ears

~ always ~

on deaf ears

and

stagnant air

~

enlightenment

*

in darkness,

i have watched my reality disintegrate.

in light,

i choose to watch it grow.

*

*

*

playing school bus…waiting for Peyton…

*

finally

~

beneath crippling fear

a constant drone of reason

for once ~  i listened

~

~

~

reaching ~ ~ ~ always

•

in the dark of night,

i search for his eyes

with the hope

they are staring down

at me.

•

i try to reconnect to a scent,

which brings

warmth and comfort

to a soul

which is struggling

to be.

•

i listen for every timbre of sound

i can grasp,

such as a voice

or

the resounding echo

of his heart beat.

•

i keep reaching

~ always reaching ~

for someone i can no longer touch,

though

i know he lives inside of me ~ ~ ~ ~

•

•

dialogue

/

/

it can take only a few words to break me

and

you chose them

all

/

no more

/

/

last night

^

in the darkness of my room,

i am cold and alone.

all is calm and quiet except the noises in my head ~

so many noises clamoring… relentlessly…

and

the worst voice of all

is

my own

^

^

taken at approximately 11:10pm on 2/2/15

^

^