both ~ away ~

.

one is across the country,

the other ~ across an ocean

and

I am in the center waiting ~

.

neither

here or there ~

.

just

waiting ~

.

waiting for this ~ profound

loneliness

to

float

away ~

.

.

Lily Lake

.

 

swept away

bookends

*

*

*

my days begin always ~ alone

&

my days end alone ~ always

*

*

*

frozen pond in the mid afternoon sun

the puzzle

…

there are so many pieces

strewn

about the table.

i carefully organize each

one.

face up, straight edges,

corners, same colors,

and

i sit for hours

~ connecting ~

finding pairs, perfect fits,

arranging and re-arranging

~ watching ~

a snapshot unfold.

minute-by-minute,

piece-by-piece,

until all can be assembled.

i stand and stare

looking down at the gaps.

many pieces are missing or broken.

i take apart each

one,

place them into a box

~ turn ~

and

walk away…

…

this puzzle may remain as is

~ unfinished ~

in a box

or

not…

only time will tell…

…

…

a world of many

~

this world is full of beating hearts

and

in the middle of them all

i stand ~

a no one amongst many

and

a someone to a few

and

always

wishing for another ~

who is

also

a no one searching for

another one

to be their someone ~

their only one

now

and

forever

~

~

~

the night air

~

as nighttime touches my skin,

my mind fills with desire

~ each heartbeat fuels a need ~

to be touched,

to be held,

to be wanted

yet

the rhythm of my cries fall on deaf ears

~ always ~

on deaf ears

and

stagnant air

~

finally

~

beneath crippling fear

a constant drone of reason

for once ~  i listened

~

~

~

dialogue

/

/

it can take only a few words to break me

and

you chose them

all

/

no more

/

/

dark voices

`

`

at night,

my loneliness

speaks the language of fear

and

sadness

`

`

`

middle ground…

:

whether I

walk or run,

fly or fall ~

I am either

steady or stumbling

along ~  ~

the twists and turns,

ups and downs,

overs and unders

and

the sideways, wrong ways and right ways of life.

:

I can never seem to find the middle ground……..

…..