four weeks to forever

November 11, 2014 at 7:55 pm 11 comments

It has been 10 years, yet it feels like it was yesterday.

Words4jp's Blog


four weeks was all we had –

to catch up and to talk,

about the past, the present


a future that would never come.


for every ounce of fear i possessed,

she held on to a dream

for the only place

she had ever longed to go –

a place to rest,

to be at peace.


i knew deep inside,

she was right –

  what was best,


that ‘the monster’ she had been given

would swallow her whole –

take what little life

there was left.


i did all i could to be with her –

to capture each and every image

in my head.

to hear every word,

every giggle,

to touch her face


feel her breath.


four weeks to the day,

her final sentence had been announced.

she left my side

to seek her dream –

no longer lost

View original post 24 more words

Entry filed under: Uncategorized.

thus ~ Wordless Wednesday – drifting…take 2

11 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Paul Handover  |  November 11, 2014 at 9:47 pm

    This reads as if it is about the Californian woman, Brittany Maynard, who came to Oregon to take her own life. Is that correct?

    • 2. words4jp  |  November 11, 2014 at 11:14 pm

      Actually, no. It is about my mom. November 11, 2004, she was diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer. We knew it was terminal but did not expect her to die 4 weeks later this year it will be 10 years since she passed away and every year I relive these memories.

      • 3. Paul Handover  |  November 11, 2014 at 11:27 pm

        Oh what can I say to convey my sadness about the loss of your mother! I suspect that, in some interconnected way, I sense what you are feeling.

        Let me explain.

        I always reflect the loss of my father on December 20th, 1956. I had just turned 12 and on the evening of the 19th, my mother came in to my bedroom to kiss me goodnight. She sat on the edge of my bed and told me that my father was very ill (he had been bed-ridden with lung cancer for a few weeks), and that he might not live for very much longer.

        I couldn’t grasp the full extent of what my mother was really saying and went off to sleep.

        In the morning, I awoke to discover that he had died in the night and that his body had been removed from the house. I never said ‘goodbye’ and every year miss him. Irrespective of the fact that had he lived on he would be 113 – he was born in 1901!

        So your words really reach out to me despite different backgrounds, different ages and different experiences.

        Big hugs!

      • 4. words4jp  |  November 11, 2014 at 11:38 pm

        I am so sorry for your loss. These memories never go away…..I was thinking about all the things my mother has missed since she passed away. All she wanted and was looking so desperately toward, were her grand children. She was here when they were born and did see them thanksgiving ’04. The following weekend the boys were with their dad, so I could not take them to Cincinnati, but the following weekend I was planning to and we were moving her into hospice. My mom passed away on Thursday night, the day before I was to pick up the boys. I was able to get there – driving very fast from Chicago to Cincy.

        Hugs to you. xxx

  • 5. LadyPinkRose  |  November 12, 2014 at 2:03 am

    Kimbery, tomorrow, I am posting a post dedicated to two women, one who just lost her Mother and the other who just lost her sister, a second sister in three months. My HOPE is that my words bring comfort to you as well. I went to your about page to get your name. Now I write it down so I don’t forget. 🙂 (((HUGS))) Amy

    • 6. words4jp  |  November 13, 2014 at 12:39 am

      You are soooooo sweet.

      • 7. LadyPinkRose  |  November 13, 2014 at 3:55 pm

        I hope by now you found that post. And it brought comfort to you. Love, Amy

      • 8. words4jp  |  November 13, 2014 at 4:24 pm

        I did Amy, thank you. I just commented on your Heart Centered post. I stated that someday I will find peace and solace. I remember that was all my mom wanted and I understood – not because of her pain and impending death, but because of her life which was not kind to her. I hope to find peace and solace before the road ends, though many times I think not. xxx

      • 9. LadyPinkRose  |  November 13, 2014 at 8:47 pm

        BIG (((HUGS))) and again look for my previous comments. It is going to be OK, Kimberly. Love, Amy

      • 10. words4jp  |  November 14, 2014 at 1:27 pm

        you are very sweet – i need you to live near me. i have gotten to the point where i have isolated myself so much that i have no one around me – physically around me. the only one who is always around is Pee, but danggit, those conversations are soooo one sided. 🙂

  • 11. LadyPinkRose  |  November 13, 2014 at 4:37 pm

    Kimberly, I am learning I must find Peace and Solace even as a walk through fires. It is a choice. Peace and Solace don’t just come to you. You have to actively seek them and then when they do come, in order to keep them, attitude is what is required. I call it Heart Centeredness. No, not easy by a long shot, especially those of us who walk a challenging Road. Today for example I feel unbalanced due to the extreme darkness that exploded around me yesterday. So today I make sure I go outside, take a walk, perhaps, no yes I will, return to the place of magic, this time without my camera, just my Heart. And there I shall breathe in deeply and evenly until I feel the MAGIC of Peace again. This I do today. I must in order for Peace to stay. (((HUGS))) Amy


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