numb – revival – take 2
March 14, 2012 at 3:46 pm Leave a comment
i have posted this blog twice before. i was told once that i should not have, so i trashed it – but i have always held onto it. this will be the third time i have posted it. yes, it is depressing, self-loathing, terrible, unconscionable really. why do i keep returning to these dark, bleak thoughts? because they are how i feel. plain and simple. i cannot openly express them because i am judged and ignored by those i confide in. so i keep them tucked away inside. why do i post them? to speak my mind and heart, i suppose. helps ease the pain a bit….
I want to feel numb – feel nothing.
Feel no love – when it goes away, I do not have to feel so bad.
Feel no hate.
Feel no guilt – for feeling no love or hate.
Feel no hurt or pain – just a nothing existence.
Numb – be dead. No feelings of anything, just nothingness.
Entry filed under: depression, feelings, Personal, Relationships. Tags: aches, depression, feelings, Personal, Relationships, sadness.
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